Leaning toward Kindness

In todays world we seem to find kindness somewhere between doing someone a favour and “hmm, what’s that word again?”

Kindness isn’t just for family, sometimes, co-workers when you need a favour or your neighbour when you can’t find anyone else to help you out. Kindness isn’t a payback feature on Facebook or Instagram. Picture, picture. Fake.

I know Im old and from an era that held kindness and compassion in the forefront of my generation. I grew up knowing my neighbours. I played outside until dark without fear that I would be taken, and we did trade sugar for coffee with people on our block. Go figure. What has happened to us as a people?

I moved to British Columbia from Detroit Michigan in the 70’s. No I didn’t run away because of the draft or as a war protestor, I moved because I married a Canadian. I was one pampered city girl in a rural cultural town of about 5000 people. I held onto the kindness of the towns people to teach me about living without the neccessities I grew up with and taken for granted.

I learned to chop wood, my main source of heat, carry water in large heavy cannisters until our well was dug and be in bed early without hydro or tv for a while. If you are thinking pity oh please don’t. I loved the adventure, I loved the challenge and I am so grateful for those neighbours and friends that showed me that kindness. No one judged me for being a city girl. We laughed about my priorities but I soon learned to fit in. My daughter will tell you one of her first memories is learning to go in a out house instad of a pottie.

We learned to communicate as a unit, we challenged our family ties, and we learned to love and appreciate where we lived.

When I thought about what to write this morning I thought about myself, my beginnings in another country. I was the immigrant. I was the outsider in which I could have felt threatened, uncared about and degraded for what I didn’t know. I am very grateful to all those that gave me warmth and friendliness, that taught me how to do things that I had taken for granted and made me into the person I am. I am grateful to pay it forward to all those who now come from a different country. Some coming not becuase they want to but because they have to.

Being human is what we are. Not white, black, brown, yellow or red. We are people who should place kindness and compassion on the top of our list.

We need to reach out and touch those that have less, that know less about our countries ways and show them kindness.

There will always be controversy, contention and a fear for the unknown. Lets get to know everyone on a human level. Lets try.

Alice oh Alice, Where are You?

Alice, oh Alice where are you?

Alice woke from a nap hearing something, a voice maybe, a sound for sure which she sensed included her name. Rubbing her eyes from the tiny sleep particles that kept them closed she opened one eye at a time. One eye could see but two eyes are visionary. “Who said that?” she quietly professed intot the distant woods. “Is someone talking to me?”

She could not quite put a distance on the sounds but knew they came from straight ahead. Close to the lake she thought to herself. Well if they cannot accknowledge themselves I guess I wil have to seek them out. Voices she huffed, always something.

The walk to the edge of the lake induced many thoughts. Thinking is what I is good at she said out loud. All kinds of thoughts from liitle items you stored in your memories, quick flashes of information to long detailed stories from which you sucked from your sub conscious. Some truthful some made up to look truthful.

Alice wondred if she was hearing voices again. This place held many things in which one of them was hearing things that didnt happen or even exist. Echos of ones own voice could be heard from a top the trees, in the small pollen of the beautiful flowers and even in the animals you came upon. What to believe was always the question.

The Question she heard, was a valid one, a mumble of clarity from somewhere distant in her void. Of course she knew where she was. She was here, right here right now in this forest. The question she then proposed is where I am is here but is it real? Am I awake or am I dreaming. She knew that this would be answered as soon as she looked upon the lake and into its face. The water always clear seemed to impose upon you a sense of clarity. Visions of faces mirrored just below the surface gave a sense of duality. Alice she said to herself, where are you?

In the same distance from where Alice walked someone walked behind her. Another shadow of Alices self also looking for the same voice that asked that same question. Where are you.

Where are you? Are you here wth me, or are you somewhere, where the words have guided you. A distant place in your mind where you also travel for clarity, from the voices inside. One can wander inside out, wondering outside in what is thruth. Where am I and can I be found?

Alice walked closer until she reached the lake. Alice of the other self also walked closer kneeling down in the underbrush just outside the range of vision of Alice.

What could they see? Each involved in their own insightfulness. One looking into the mirror of the surface of the lake, the other looking at the girl who looked at the surface of the lake. What would they know, and what would they acknowledge. The clock struck the hour.


Where are you Alice? I want to know.

To be continued.


Just a Little While Longer

Some days we say “just a little while longer” Time tells us back, “tick tock, tick tock.” How long can we wait until time runs out on us? How much life do we loose waiting every time we cannot a make a decision? We linger. We wait. We cannot seem to choose.

The sun shines, somedays, and sometimes it doesnt. Our decisions contine on and on and on until one day its as if the sun forgot to not only shine, but to even rise from the east. We take time, yet we do not have that luxury in the end. Time runs out. We are such procrastinators. Sometimes one way, some days another way. Just like a washing machine, back and forth then round and round, nothing gets accomplished.We wait ,e wander and we think.

Its time to turn the hands of time. Its time to take the time we misuse and waste and turn it on ourselves and make something happen. We want then we dont want. We wish and then regret what we may have received through the wish. Time to move on. Think about it yet dont think. Be and then become a choice, any choice just make one. Its not as if that choice will be glued to your fingers forever. Glue eventually wears off just like choice. Its better to decide something then to do nothing. Time remember, tick tock then time is gone and so are your choices.. Tick tock,tick tock. Choosing to surrender and moving forward is better than standing still complaining about what could have already been put into motion.

When we were little and couldn’t swim, we learned. One foot deeper until we took the plunge. Did we stand in the sand overlooking the water wishing all day to learn, as kids we just chose as adults we sit and ponder. Which is better for the soul. You tell me your thoughts. I feared the water until one day a friend picked me up and threw me into the pool. I swam, then I laughed and I never looked back.

The sun doesn’t complain that it doesn’t have time to get up. Nor the moon behave badly because it needs to get a move on to light up the dark skies. Were spoiled. We think that just by thinking we get where we need to be. Its the revrese. Do not think it, just choose and do it. Better yet just put the shoes on and make a move. One step and then another, before you know it your moving and things are getting done.

So now I’m done. I actually wrote this for me because I used to be one. I and that wishy washy washing machine that someone forgot to tell its spin. I attack with furvor and then stop mid way reconsidering if I went the right way. Who cares I wish I would have realized I moved. That is the importance of it all, movement. Put the human machine on go forward and walk away. No time lose, no adjustment s made unless you hear the buzzer. Intuition will most times let you know if you need any. How much happiness is waisted on thinking it through, how many times? I have a new lease and its called listening to my heart beat and turning inside to where we know time ticks and we get it done.

Love yourself and let the mind stop spinning and see clearly. The sun rises and the sun sets. So do we all.

Today I will Be Alice, in her Wonderland. A Story so sit and listen.

Alice in Wonderland or is it Alice in wander. What can she find? What does she achieve?

Today I would be Alice. Wandering in my land of illusion, diillusion, priority and necessity.

I will move consciously through my myth, coming out the otherside a hero. Yes a hero. My hero witstanding all illusions as some kind of innate knowledge. Things that no one knows but me.

Its the tree. That beautiful tree that stands alone in a forest. Protected by invisible beings of life and light. Who are they and why do they tempt me to sit beneath in their splender? But there is also the hole at the bottom. Itself a temptress, its depth not easily perceived, its width wide enough to swallow me whole, I am tempted to see. I will need a flashlight, a light from somewhere.

I try to recognize its depth and length but I cant see that well. Do I sit here in judgement or do I just just go inside and see where it takes me. I shall because I have nothing better to do today, my thought being blind to what I could be.

Sliding down; sliding down for what seems forever. Dark, damp, bumpy and fun. Free to dissolve myself into nothingness. Those God’s of the tree how they must laugh at us humans when we delve deep into our psyche. “Go deep my friend, see what cannot be scene from the surface.” As they laugh full of joy for each of us who try.

I continue downward, roots try to stop my progress, rocks hurt my behind, but I go forward nonchalantly, expessing my joy for the unknown.

At last I am. I find myself at the bottom of the shoot. The roots release me and I am open to a new vision. What do I see you may be asking? What do I see. I see a path of dirt and rock, to the side I see fields of lavender and wild flowers who seem to wink at me and my awkwardness. As I stand to release the tension I find myself squinting. I see into the distance a lake or maybe its a mirror of relfection? Shall I challenge myself and become adventurous?

My thinking of this place is complacent. I want to run back up the tree but I also want to let go and explore. What do I do, well I just do. I am gone, gone for ever and that is only for how long forever is. Is it a moment in time or is it time as an non existent objective? Guess I will find out won’t I. As I out one foot infront of another I hear a song, someone singing an obsure tune. Well what better to pursue but a voice in the middle of an adventure.

See you soon as I explore my path, free of the detatchments or reasons for being. I will go on completely without expectation or a deliverance into a greater knowing. Im just going to go. Maybe I will find myself.



What is a conversation?

Does it start with a question or a quest for knowledge?

Is it appropriate or appreciated? Conversed or constricted?

Whose listening? Who has closed ears because of their own internal conversation?

If perople listened would it be different? Could we learn anything, because we listened? Would the world be changed or challenged because we gave someone the right to be heard?

Does coversation lead to compassion? Out of the box thinking where new ideas are born?

Can we have more than a positive reaction, and not so much negate what the other person is saying?

Do we respect their version, or do we listen to our own version instead. “What did you say?”

Can we live together in harmony because we listened, enjoyed, learned and loved the idea of a conversation with someone we admire, repsect and have comapssion for the cause?

You tell me.IMG_0043



Buddah Smiles

As I look about my office I see ecclectic things. How I arranged those things and what it all means to me.

I have buddah smiles, mantra beads, aboriginal carvings and pictures old and dear to me.

Belief is ominus and omnipotent. It is sereal and serendipitous. It grieves with us and it brings joy also. How much can we take in?

Beringers of love, havesting emotion, these little trinkets come in many sizes and shapes just like our feelings. Hold a crystal, place your hands on a bead and pray. it feels good.

Belief is a hard half followed by believing. What truthes does it hold for you, what feelings come pouring out? Thoughts beware.

When I want to feel better I laugh with Buddah knowing that it is ridiclous to feel the way I portrait myself. Self worth, unlove you name it it can come forward.

When Im sad I look at a picture of my mom. She brings me love and a knowing that it will get better, it always does.

Anger, what does one pick up and hold when anger and fear hold the soul captive?

Faith is everything yet it is nothing. Faith in your self helps unite the whole person. One able to circumnavigate, the globe of self and come home again. Being and belonging to the world in so many ways. From storm clouds to a hot sunny day we can complete and compliment our selves in so many ways. Being open and honest, truthful and caring.

To glance about and hold onto each piece of the room and be gratful that I have these little items to heal me.

They are like friends you speak to and hear in the quiet of your heart.

This morning its me, the clouds that will soon bring rain. Its all about my macha tea, my words and how I got here.

Where are you this am? Harbouring pain, fear, anger, lonliness? How about a change of heart and embrace love, joy, compassion and the soul. Pick a trinket a piece of yourself and hold on tight. Cry, yell, feel bad then look into


the eyes of the Buddah and laugh until you sides hurt. Namaste and good morning to all.

The rain removes debris, the sun heats the heart and the moon will clear the soul.

New Year, New Ideas

Some years are good years, full of riches. Soulful riches, when you have ideas and your plans work out. Other years seem lean, no fat for the bacon you want to taste, smell and ultimately eat.

2016 was a lean year. We had to work hard for what we received. Our mind evaluated too much stuff, our bodies grew even though we asked it not to. The activity seemed to enlarge our ego and do little for the belly fat. We got older.

If we had children, they rebeled. If we had partners and marraiges they became difficult and unmanagable. No one wanted to cooperate within your field of vision. Yes?

2017 is now upon us. A new year, new ideas.

Choices will abound, always do. Managing those new ideas, new choices, unwanted challenges and they come. How will you survive?

Will you succumb or will you be successful in your endevours to swim and not sink? So many choices, so many avenues to sink or swim. What do you do?

Will you survive? Find out what makes you happy. What makes you not stress out at the choices laid out in front of you. Be brave in those choices. Even when it becomes a challenge, find the courage to move forward until another choice makes its voice known. You will survive.

All roads have bumps and ditches. But we do have mental tools to make it over and around them. Be aware. Don’t drive too fast, walk instead of run. Take the time to read the instructions before you proceed. Its all good advice. When you decide to go swimming take one step into the emotional waters at a time. Feel for those divits, those stones and sink holes so you don’t drown. Be wise and observant.

Nothing I am saying to you has not been said before, but when you can visualize the turmoil, challenge yourself or slow down and see what might be wrong with the picture.You will find the grace you need to move forward. Sword and sheild, armour, not always neccessary, but it’s all there for a reason if you need it. That reason being your self worth, your growth and your potential happiness.

Go for it but go slow. Be kind to you mind by rethinking it over in more than one way. Be brave and say not yet when it comes to choices.

The final word is Love. Love yourself and know that not all choices are the right ones. Even though they may feel good in the moment they may have strings attached that you cannot see or forsee the pitfalls. You can do what you choose to do, just take a deep breath before you do it.

Gotta go, time for me to put this into action for myself.

Peace out.