Days like these feel like tomorrow will never come. Cloudy skies, plans put on hold, things envisioned in ones mind; stuck, like dried mud on the shoes.
What does one do? Reminisce about yesterdays gone? Choices you encountered, the good ones that worked? Sunshine happened but now the clouds cover the blueness of the sky. Heavy hearted the low pressure builds inside of you making you tremble like the thunder as it approaches from the west.
“Tomorrow I will feel better. Tomorrow I will work harder to achieve the best I can be. Tomorrow, tomorrow, tomorrow.
Today I will sit in the gloom, breathe in the darkness from the skies above, wait for the lighting to strike comparing it to the energy I feel inside. Outside I see nothing I like, nothing I could attain right now. I cant even move my legs. The grayness embodies me, like a picture I forgot to shade in.
Ah, but tomorrow I can jump right in, race to the finish line and break free from the turmoil I have now. Tomorrow, tomorrow, tomorrow.
The sun has desserted me.
The strength of my will. I connected, as I ran away from all my fears, up the hill, down the path to redemption. When was that? Oh, yesterday. I can still see the mud on my shoes. Yesterday I challenged myself to do better, did I do that? I cannot recall.
I chased the wind, the one that is now silent. The stillness irritates me, it causes me to think about myself. I think I am sufficating, or am I suffering for no other reason than I want to.
I can see myself doing the impossible, I can close my eyes and find a vacation from my hurt, but I cannot move from one thought to another. Why does tomorrow wait to come.
Tomorrow I will do what I cannot today. Why is that? Why does tomorrow look more promising? Why does it tell me to wait, when all I want to do is scream, ” Not tomorrow, today”.
There are no tomorrows. There is no promise of tomorrow. There is only today, I tell my searching soul. Even today is absent because soon it will be tomorrow and I will still be sitting here looking out the window believing tomorrow will be better.
Tomorrow, tomorrow, tomorrow. Can it be tomorrow already. What happened to yesterday when I climbed that mountain and prayed to do better, to think better, be more positive?
Never mind I will do that tomorrow. Closing my eyes I will think about what tomorrow will be like.