I’m Sorry I Missed You

I’m sorry I missed you. I’m sorry you had to go because I was late.

Can I blame my GPS for mistaking and taking me to the wrong address? Yes that’s it, the GPS is at fault. I put in the address you gave me, wrote it down just like you said. Oh wait did you give me the right address? Could you have mixed up some numbers?

I did try. I called too, but you didn’t answer. I even stopped by a phone booth and looked for a phonebook but there wasnt one there. I tried my phone but for some reason your address wasn’t in my phone nor your number either. Oh yeah, you changed it didn’t you. The last time we spoke you told me that and I guess I was so preoccupied with my own “stuff” that I didn’t write it down. My bad. I remember now you even telling me to get a pen because I always forget, your so smart. But now how can I find you before you leave?

You promised me you would wait so we could talk. Now what am I suppose to do. Call your mom? Do you think she could help me out? She does like me, doesn’t she? Well I thought she did. I tried to call her but she wasn’t home. Her answering machine came on but who knows when she will actually get the message. I wish I could have convinced her to get a cell phone.

I am here sitting by the side of the road, looking at your address, tying to figure out where I messed up? It’s so hot in the car, I’m sweating and it’s clammy. I think I am getting quite upset because I know you are most likely gone by now. Your words are ringing in my ear. I remember, “be on time”. “Don’t be late, this is your last chance.” Where did I go wrong? Me and my preoccupation with my own thoughts has gotten me exactly where I said I wouldn’t allow myself to go. Why didn’t I listen, to you?

I am sorry, I messed up. Couldn’t you have just waited? You knew I would end up forgetting something, so why didn’t you call me? It would have been so easy. Where are you. I better leave the side of the road and do something, go somewhere. Maybe if I just go home I will see you parked in the drive, that would be so like you to give in again and make it alright. Your so good at letting me get away with my stuff even though I said I was trying. I am you know, really, trying that is. This is just a glitch.

One more chance and I will get it right. Let’s go back in time, back to the beginning, where we can be honset and truthful. Well me anyways. You always were honest, me not always.

Ok, here I go, I will find my way back to the beginning and see If I can figure out where I made the mistake. maybe get the GPS to reroute me to the proper location. Oh, maybe run into one of your friends and they will tell me where you are. Alright here I go. Hope I see you soon.

As I turned the corner I thought I saw you standing there. Where you waiting for me? I couldn’t turn around fast enough there was a procession of cars going to the cemetary and I had to wait my turn, so I followed them. I thought I saw you get into the lead car and smile. you did didn’t you. I knew I would find you.

My GPS told me to turn and I did. It did show me where to go. I just should have listened sooner. I miss you. I closed the door and you stood beside me, held my hand. I’m not as stong as you. I leaned in and quietly whispered in your ear as I laid down the rose I brought to give you today. It’s a beautiful rose, as red as the lipstick you liked to wear.

As I walked back to my car I looked up at the sun and felt the warmth of your heart in mine. The only words I could say are” I promise I will do better, and I will.”


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