Happy Thanksgiving Canada. What are you thankful for?
I wonder if we could just be thankful we are thankful. Say thank you to everyone and everything. There is no, I am thankful because….? Just “THANKS” for the moment, the present, the now. Tomorrow will come sooner than we want it to. Can’t hold back time, tell time to take a minute. Find more seconds before the next thankful comes along.
Let’s enjoy the people, the places and not the desires and expectations we all become thankful for. I be me, you be you and thanks for that.
Does one size fit all? When it comes to people can we say this? If we can are we saying we are all the same when it comes to thinking, doing, becoming?
Is it assumed that our neighbours should think, believe, act, the same way as the whole does? That they should think the same way, understand it the same way you do? What about the people in your house? Our parents, our partner, our children do they count as being the same or different. Can we acknowledge them as different mind, having other thoughts than you do? Have we raised individuals or clones one generation to the next?
Why would we want one size to fit all. We come from diversity, as much as commonality. To honour another for their difference is being able to say you too are a unique being on this planet. To be able to think, create and be as you choose instead of following a concept that doesn’t fit, is that truth?
Are we that afraid to stand up and be counted? Are we that self centred that we want everything to be like we are? Are we that wounded that the bandage will never come off. I definitely do not want to wear a size that doesn’t fit. Yet we are told one size fits all.
I am until I am not! Then I am again. If I am me then who am I? If I change I will no longer be me, that makes me afraid.
To be anew makes me different so I am not me I am a new me. I don’t know you? Who are you? I am me you may say yet who is me? I am.
I am until I am not then I am a new me, a not me, can I see me? I am no longer. I am a believer in change. If I can change me can you change you? If you are no longer you who are you? Will you say to me, “If I am no longer me, who am I?”
It’s 11am and I’m home. I can call it a day off, a rest day, mental health day but what I really want to call it is a “Get out of my head day.”
Sleeping is so relaxing because on one end your body is immobilized and healing and other the other end, I can say the head end, we are out of our minds. When we have a good sleep we wake up relaxed and ready to conquer the day. We have been out of your mind and in some fashion being who we really are.
We are creatures of habit, habits form our waking hours, actualize our day and create the lives we live. It’s like playing poker with ourselves, none revealing their hand, afraid to do so in case one may loose. Should we care? I thought so yet after thinking about it I had decided it better to just lay down the hand I am given and proceed accordingly. Is it about winning or loosing in a 24 hour period? Makes we wonder.
Am I out of my mind? I’d like to so, because if I am maybe I actually have a chance. Do I care about what I have left to do, of my life. Do we need to reconcile where we have been (the past?) Do we walk directly into the path of the future? I think we need to not think so much, because if we pay attention to where we have been the future we just run us over without regret. It will then be us once again regretting a past that we had not recognized.
So today I decided to get out of my head and into the realizations of what I can do differently to change up the pattern. “The pattern is the pattern” yet we can change those patterns we all have and develop a mind richer in who are are. We can let the what we are become the focus of how we live out our lives in a more respectful way. I’m talking about loving ourselves more.
All I have to do is move over to the side of the road, view what I want, the career I have, the relationships I have and let life do the rest. Then instead of getting run over by the future before I see it and letting the past push me around I get to see clearly who, what and how I run my life. Run away I say and find yourself a winner to the experiences you have and not a participant in a race you never signed up for. So here I am and there I go. Ready, willing and able to be me.
Writing is my filter and today I do it differently. I will let you know if I get anywhere.
So a funny thing happened today. Let me fill you in a little bit so it makes sense. I tend to run off at the mouth and then I will get this dumb look from others as I realize I hadn’t taken into account they were not there. So from the beginning……
About a month ago I was involved in a conversation with my friend about another person of interest. The conversation was about how this one person, I will call A, was mad at the other person whom I will call T because of unanswered texts. I listened half hearted at a menu of reason why T should have text him back right away. “Was it life or death” I asked as he stood before me eyes glaring. He wanted reassurance that he was right and T had wronged him. The text was a few days old at the time so I asked him to retext.
Life goes on, yada yada, and I completely forgot about the texting conversation until once again I heard the story from A. It had evolved as he tried to text him again and to no avail had he returned it. Now I heard other questions coming form my friends mouth. “Do you think he’s mad at me? Could I have done something to offend him?” I didn’t know, how could I yet I was being asked to relate to him a story he wanted to hear. I hadn’t talked to T either. (Oh see I already forgot to tell you he lives in the same building as us.) I suggested he go upstairs and knock on his door. No that wasn’t an option. He was offended. I shrugged my shoulders and just said “that’s what I would do, there must be an explanation.”
Now it’s about a month later and the conversation had never come up so I thought it was resolved. We were walking up the drive after our fitness and we saw T driving toward us with another person we knew. He rolled down the window and waved to me but seemed to ignore A. Now I thought that something was definitely off. A walked on and T said nothing more than “Hi how is it going to me.” Another question was why and I soon got the answer from A in another speech of the same old thing.
Let me continue yet the story could go on forever but it didn’t. Today as we were parking I saw T across the road by his car. I was determined to get to the bottom of this and it would be now. So I walked up toT and noticed A hang back. I asked him the same question that had started this whole menagerie hoping for some kind of reconciliation.
Guess what, he had text him. Lots and lots of text in return to the original. He too was upset because of no response. OMG. Two grown men and they couldn’t walk up or down to meet the other half way and ask the question “Whats up.” So they figured it out and like two little boys sauntered away happy as they could be to enjoy each others company leaving me to carry the groceries without help.
Words have it, I don’t. Sentences can relate to a days activities, I can’t always understand. Who am I?
To write a paragraph means I have to sit down and explain to myself those things that I sometimes want to forget. Maybe I choose to remember the good times and devalue the not to pleasant. Who am I to say? Anyone can write down a story yet is it true.
Words have a better relationship to language than we do to ourselves. We are who we think we are but are we? Define it in words, express it in a sentence, believe it as you read it. Word has it!
Sign it with your hands, sing it with your voice, pen to paper or phone to text. Word up makes you happy or sad.
WORD. Worthy, Organic, Radiant, Delightful. Tell it like it is. Worthless, Ordinary, Regretful, Depressed. Who am I? Better check the dictionary and find out. WORD OUT.
I’d Like to vacuum my brain, clean out the trapped information, suck out the not so necessary information.
I’d like to replace it with absolutely nothing more than air, helium that raises me up. Call up the energizer bunny to hop around making tracks for me to follow. Brain power that carries with it usable knowledge and believable information.
Maybe I can use a can opener to open up the hard wired misinformed memories and scoop out the brain that doesn’t matter.
I will replace it all with happiness, joy, living in the moment where the ideas that are important can have room to move and motivate me. I can transpire and inspire the dead parts of me to grow new shoots and wind itself about creating a beautiful landscape that I can sit with and love.
